IF YOU COULD SAY ANYTHING

Here's the instructions:List ten things you want to say to people you know but you never will, for whatever reason. Don't say who they are. Use each person only once:

This is hard. I want to use a couple of people more than once, but I will stick to the rules. Here goes;

1. Before I had children, I was the perfect parent too. Just like you.

2. They are your parents, not mine. I don't care what you do, just leave me out of it.

3. Pay attention to your daughter. Can't you see she is crying for attention. I don't care that you are tired. It doesn't matter that you have already raised two children, this one needs your attention now. It is not up to the neighborhood, or your daughter to raise this one.

4. What do you do all day? You have no job and no kids in the house all day. How come you never clean your kitchen?

5. Please don't judge me. I am doing the best I can. I am not perfect. My life is different from yours. I know you don't like the choice I am making, but I have to do what I can live with.

6. Yes, I know your daughters are perfect. I know your other granddaughter is perfect. Guess what. You have four other grandchildren. Someday, my kids will grow up to be people you want to spend time with. It will be too late. They won't want anything to do with you. It is starting already. Wake up.

7. I don't want you to touch me.

8. You took advantage of my innocence! I hate you for that. For years it has bothered me. I was your daughter's friend. How could you do that to me? You were friends with my grandparents. Have you no shame?

9. I want things to go back the way they were. You said you loved me. If you loved me, you couldn't turn your feelings off like that. It is tearing me up. I want to walk away from you, but I can't. Stay with me forever. Love me forever. Kiss me like I want to be kissed. Hold me and never let go.

10. I have screwed up. I made so many mistakes in my life. I know you love me. But if you knew what bad things I have done, you would be so disappointed in me. I never want to see you disappointed in me.

That wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. It was painful though.

Monday update

Okay, I had my Monday class tonight. This is the class where the instructor mysteriously disappeared last time. We wondered if he was dead. Turns out he is not dead after all. He had a bad allergic reaction and was in no condition to teach. He brought donuts to class tonight to apologize. All is forgiven. What can I say, I am cheap and easy. I can be bribed. However, now I have a shitload of homework. How does that make sense? He misses class and I have extra homework. In what world does that make sense. Oh well not much you can do about it. Not too much else shakin around here. I am still drooling over J.D and the INXS concert. I hope to have more interesting stuff later. Night all. Oh yeah, I think I might change the template here. I can't seem to get new paragraphs to work. I hope I don't lose anything good if I switch. Wish me luck.

INXS

Okay, here it is a quick update about the concert. IT WAS FANTASTIC!!! It was well worth the wait. The opening act was Scott Stapp. The name was vaguely familiar, but I couldn't place it. (Please no hate mail from fans). Once he started playing I recognized some of his stuff. He used to be the lead singer for Creed. I did enjoy his new stuff and I am considering buying his CD. The crowd was great too. We sat next to a wonderful couple from Brandon. They were so much fun. Too bad they live so far away. Before the concert started, there was a drunk who sat in the row in front of us. We were taking bets how long it would take before he was thrown out. He wasn't rude or anything. Just very drunk. We expected him to fall down the stairs. As expected, he was removed before the show even started. I didn't win the bet. I thought he would make it at least til the opening act. J.D. was smokin hot! He changed his shirt right on stage. Whew!! Too bad he didn't leave it off. He did things to that microphone stand. Let me tell you. I would give everything I own to have him to that to me. I bought the shirt that has a copy of his arm tattoos on it. If you are not a fan I will explain it. On one arm, he has HUMAN on the other he has BEING. He explained it this way. We are always HUMAN BEINGS but sometimes we are only BEING HUMAN. He can switch the arms around to explain it. He did a great job of all the old INXS stuff. He put his spin on it. It turned out fantastic. Plus they played my favorite old INXS song. Original Sin. They didn't play Listen Like Thieves or my favorite new song, Perfect Strangers. It was still amazing. Kirk Pengilly was on our side of the stage. He really played to us. He didn't forget that cuz we weren't on the floor, we weren't there. I was very impressed. Bottom line is I had a wonderful time. I owe a big thank you to Chrissy Troy and Ace Burpee of Hot 103 for the tickets. Thanks guys! You rock! (next time though backstage passes would be appreciated )

WHERE I LIVE

I am sorry about this one Mark. Mark asked people who read his blog to post a little about where we live. Since I have been so self centered lately, it has taken me a while to get to this. Please forgive the lateness. Here it is anyway. WINNIPEG I live in the city of Winnipeg. It is the capital city of the province of Manitoba. Manitoba is in the center of the province. We are known as theKeystone Province. Unlike Toronto, we do not think we are the center of the universe, even though we are in the center of the country. (Sorry, it just seems to be a favorite past time of Peggers to slam Toronto whenever given the chance.) Winnipeg now has the approximate population of 600,000. There are many bedroom communities outside of the city limits too. Winnipeg has a lot to offer. Once you get past the cold weather. We have many beautiful parks and open spaces. One of the largest is Assiniboine Park. Today, for instance is the Teddy Bear's Picnic in the park. It is to raise money for the Children's Hospital. The zoo is also in the park. I live about 2 minutes from the park. One of our biggest attractions in the city is called The Forks. It is basically a meeting place. There are shops and restaurants there. The ball park is just across from it. It is called The Forks because it is where the Assiniboine River and The Red River meet. The ball park is home to the Winnipeg Goldeyes baseball team. The Goldeyes are a member of the Northern League. We are quite proud of our Goldeyes. Plus tickets are not that expensive either. I think the top price for a ticket is $18.00. What else can you do with your family for that amount? Winnipeg also has a professional football team. The Winnipeg Blue Bombers. We have an AHL hockey team here too. The Manitoba Moose. We used to have an NHL team the Winnipeg Jets. They are long gone from here but always in our hearts. It is still a touchy subject here. Winnipeg is known for it's generosity. We give a lot in volunteer hours and money. We have hosted the Pan Am games, the Grey Cup (even when no other city wanted to, we stepped up to the plate). If there is a charity event where volunteers are needed you can bet Peggers will be there to support it. We have Folklorama every summer. It is basically two weeks of celebrating different cultures. We have pavilions you can visit. Each pavilion represents a different country. You can taste the food, see the culture, and the entertainment for each country. My daughters danced at the Isle Of The Shamrock pavilion for three years. They started dancing in it when they were three. We also have this annoying sport called curling. Since I hate this sport, we will not discuss it further. The downside to our city is we are home to the Child Poverty capital of Canada. We are also the Arson capital. We used to be the murder capital too, but I am not sure if we still are. In my neighborhood, it is not uncommon to find two and sometimes three generations of families that live here. The school my daughters go to is almost 100 years old. People who live here tend to come back.

In Winnipeg and Manitoba, we have a unique tradition. When you are getting married, you have what we call, a social. Basically, it is a big party. You buy a ticket to get in. Once in there is music, dancing, and cheap alcohol. There are also prizes you can win. It is an adult only event, but it is used to help raise money for the wedding couple to pay for their wedding (or at least help).

If you want to know more about my city you can visit here; http://www.winnipeg.ca/interhom/ I hope this helps you learn a little about where I live. We do make fun of our city, but deep down, I think we are all proud of it. Maybe you can come for a visit.

Innards Are Scary

Yuck! I just cleaned out my fridge. It was disgusting to say the least. I found FIVE half full bottles of barbecue sauce. I also found most of my missing tupperwear. I think I will have a short memorial service for them. It was easier to just throw them out then try to salvage them. Apparently, green is not a happy color for leftovers. Who knew. This little exercise made me think of a story I read a long time ago. I think it was in Reader's Digest. For some reason it always stuck in my mind. Here it goes, as best as I can remember. A business man had been on the road for a very long time. He was getting bored with restaurant food. One day, he started thinking about his favorite meal. He hadn't seen it on any menu he could remember. That night he went to an exclusive and very expensive restaurant. He checked the menu and sure enough, his favorite meal wasn't there. He motioned to the waiter and made a request. The waiter thought about it for a moment then said he would have to check with the chef. The waiter returned shortly. He informed the businessman that while the requested item wasn't on the menu, the chef would prepare it for him. The businessman was quite pleased. When his meal was prepared, the chef brought the meal to him personally. The businessman was surprised at this special treatment. The chef said to the man, "In all my years as a chef, this is the first time I have had this request. I had to deliver it to you myself. I wanted to meet the man who ordered a peanut butter sandwich" If only all things in life were this uncomplicated. If they were, I wouldn't find FIVE opened bottles of barbecue sauce in my fridge.

New Blog

Hello gang! I have decided to take a page from Mark's book. I have created a new blog. I will post my upbeat thoughts and general complaints here. On the new blog I will post my tears. You are welcome to visit there, but if you find it too depressing I will understand. You can find me a http://turtletears.blogspot.com

SCARY ISN'T IT ?

Your Mood Ring is Light Blue

Emotions mixed Unsettled Cool

Mood Ring Generator

THE BIG DAY IS HERE!

THE BIG DAY IS FINALLY HERE! TODAY IS INXS!!!!! MAY THE PARTY BEGIN!!!! but I am not excited at all........ YA RIGHT GO JD!

memo from my broken heart

3 Doors Down Lyrics

3 Doors Down Music Video Codes

Music Video Codes by VideoCure.com

I try not to let it hurt. I really try. You are an addiction. I need to be away from you for my own good, but I can't. When we are together, you hurt me. I know you don't mean to but you do. To get some relief, I feel I have to *** ******. I know this makes you mad. You tell me if I *** ****** again you will walk away forever. Maybe that is the right thing. Maybe that is what should happen. I don't know where to turn or what to do. ******* ****** lets some of the pain out. I know you don't understand but it does. You say you aren't trying to hurt me. I know that you don't mean to. But it hurts anyway. I am so tired of hearing how perfect she is. She is perfect. She lives with her perfect sister with her perfect nephew. She has time to go to the gym, play baseball, go out, blah blah blah. I am sick of hearing how I don't measure up. I know you may not realize you are comparing us but you are and it hurts. I hope I have the strength to walk away. I don't know if I am strong enough. Now I am told that tattoo are unwholesome. Guess who went with me to get mine. Hmmmm. Oh please let me guess. She doesn't have one does she.

HAPPY HNT!

WHY CAN'T WE ALL BE LIKE THIS?

My misery

It's 106 miles to Chicago, we have a half a pack of cigarettes, a full tank of gas, it is dark and we are wearing sunglasses. Hit it. My favorite movie. It usually cheers me up. Not today. I haven't slept in two days. I try, I just can't fall asleep. I wrote my exam last night. Let's just say it didn't go as well as I had hoped. I sure hope I pass this course. I would hate to have to take it over again. The teacher is a nice person, I just don't want to have to go through it again. After the exam she walked me to the door she had some encouraging words for me. She thanked me for participating in class and said it was nice to have me in her class. That was nice of her. It is hot here. I mean REALLY HOT! I can't stand the heat and humidity. It does nothing to improve my mood. On the bright side, I have the day off. Once the school age kids go to school, I am free till 4:00. A friend of mine is taking me out for lunch. I don't know where we are going and I don't care. He is a really nice guy. (No Leigh, it is not who you think). This friend has a daughter who is best friends with my daughter. He is lonely too. We make a good pair. We have both screwed up. I wanted to enjoy the sun yesterday. My legs are blindingly (is that a word?) white. I hate wearing shorts when they look like that. Too bad, by the time I was ready to go outside, it was raining. That little shower did not help the humidity. Maybe I will have better luck today. You have to have hope.

did you forget about me

You forgot me. You used to call me at least six times a day. Now she is in your life and you have no time for me. You said you loved me. How can your feelings change so fast? You said we will always be friends. Will we? Or will you move on without me? My heart is in a million pieces. I would have left everything for you. Instead you left me behind. Why wouldn't you wait for me? I read things into everything you say. When you call, I let myself believe that it is because you miss me. I know now, that is not the way it is. I let you in even though I knew I shouldn't. Now it is time to pay the piper. No one said it would hurt so much. I want my inside to be empty. If there is nothing inside, it can't hurt so much.

Stolen from SLY

1. 1. Would you marry for money? I'd marry for money, sex, or love. In a book I read once, the mom says a woman should marry times. The first for love, second for money, third for security and the fourth for companionship. Made sense to me.
2. Have you had braces? No
3. Could you live without a computer? Not a chance. Then who would I bitch to?
4. If you could live in any past time period, where would it be? Someone once told me I reminded them of a hippie from the sixties. Not a hippie from today but a Woodstock hippie. That would be me.
5. . Do you drink enough water? No.
6. . Do you wear shoes in the house or take 'em off? I take them off. How can I yell at the kids about not dragging dirt into the house if I do it. I can only use "because I am the Mom " so many times.
7. What are your favorite fruits? Strawberries, Raspberries, Green Grapes. They have to be green.
8. What is your favorite place to visit? Home.
9. Are you photogenic?Not a chance. Ever wonder why there are no pictures of me here? That is why. I always look either like I have been hit rrepeatly by the ugly truck or I escaped from the mental hospital. Neither is pretty.
10. Do you dream in color or black and white? Colour
11. Why did you take this survey? I ran out of ideas for the blog that weren't depressing.( That might still follow though) so I stole this from SLY.
12. Do you drink alcohol? Yup. More than I used to . Bailey's and milk is my poison. I justify it by claiming it is my calcium for the week.
13. What is the most beautiful language? Spanish
14. Do you like being kissed when you are asleep? I am asleep, how am I supposed to know? Now I am happy if anyone kisses me at all.
15. What do you like Most: Sunrise or sunset? Sunset. If I am watching a sunrise, it means I got up way to early.
16. Do you want to live until you're 100 yrs old? Most days I don't want to live til the end of the week.
17. Is a flat stomach important to you? I want one, but not enough to do thousands of situps.
18. When you watch movies at home, do you like the lights switched on or off? Off!
19. Do you believe in magic? Isn't that a song?
20. Do you like to watch cartoons? Since I am trapped in a house full of children, cartoons are a neccessary evil. However, I do enjoy Arthur and will watch him when no one else is home.
21. At what age did you find out that Santa Claus wasn't real? There is no Santa Claus?!? Now your going to tell me there is no Easter Bunny either.
22. Do you write poems? No
23. Do you snore? Yes. Especially when I have a cold, am overtired or stressed.
24. You sleep more on your back, front,or sides? Side and stomach.
25. Would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler? Neither. Not a big fan of dogs.
26. Are you basically a happy person? You have to be kidding me.
27. Are you tired? Not yet
28. Do you drink anything with caffeine? Coffee, Tea, Coke
29. How many landline/cellphones do you have in your house? One landline. Two cell phones.
30. Do you get along with your parents? Yes.
31. Do u smoke? No
32. Do you have a kittycat? Yes. Snowwhite was rescued from the animal shelter. However she prefers my husband. (No Mark, you can't eat them.)
33. Have you ever had a birthday party? My mom used to make the best birthday parties. Now that I am grown up, no one has one for me.
34. What do you do when you're sad? Listen to music and blog.
35. What do you need most now? Someone to love me with passion forever. (and a hug)
36. What song are you listening to now? I Should Be Sleeping. (It makes me think of him. He sings it to me sometimes)
37. What are you craving right now? Him.

SATURDAY NIGHT BLUES

It is the long weekend here. Let me rephrase that. It is a loooonnnnngggg weekend here. I am so bored. My sort of plans for tonight didn't happen. Now I am stuck in these four walls yet again. The man I am married to says it is nice to stay at home. Sure he gets out of these four walls. I am stuck here 24 hours a day. I want out!!!! Most of my friends are away for the weekend so I can't even call them up and ask if they want to do something. I can't even get the husband to go to the movies. I am so bored. (Oh sorry, did I say that already?) I should be studying. I have my exam on Tuesday, but I don't feel like it. I have a bad case of the saturday night blues. Someone save me.

RANDOM THOUGHTS (JUST IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING)

This is my favorite shirt. I had one person tell me he thought it was perfect for me. Not sure if it is a compliment or not. Oh well. I like it. I have decieded that despite all the potential dangers, I love MSN. Last night I had a chat with a friend I haven't seen in almost 11 years. It was wonderful. It is so much cheaper than calling long distance. Plus almost every night, I have a standing date with a friend. We usually catch up with each other around ten each night. I must admit some days that is what keeps me going. I look forward to that contact with the outside world. Blogging is good, but I like the instant feedback. Here is where I become a hypocrit though. I won't let my kids on it. Drives them batty. I give them the old stand by line.... "Because I am the Mommy that is why I can" One more random thought. I stole this quote from SLY. I love it. It might become my new mantra. Ready.... "I KILLED CUPID IN SELF DEFENSE"

Why are people so blind? They don't see what is right in front of them.

A SPECIAL HNT DAY!!!

Today is a special HNT day. Osbasso has informed us that today is the first anniversary of HNT. He has requested we post our first HNT picture and a new one. Since all my HNT pictures have been deleted, I decieded to repost them all plus my anniversary picture. BE KIND!

LAUGH OF THE DAY

I got this in an email sent to me by a friend. It made me laugh so I thought I would share it. THIRTY LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend on Me!
4. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
5. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
6. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.
7. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me
8. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
9. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
10. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are missing.
11. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
12. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
13. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
14. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
15. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
16. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
17. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!
18. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
19. Procrastinate Now!
20. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
21. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
22. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance
23. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
24. They call it PMS because MadCow Disease was already taken.
25. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.
26. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
27. Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
28. The trouble with life is there's no background music.
29. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on. and my personal favorite;
30. The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson. Because as we all know, happiness is a warm gun and a cold body!

Mondays Officially Blow...

Yes, I know it is Tuesday, but Monday was such a lousy day, I didn't have time to rant. Home ownership is not all it is cracked up to be. Yes I love that I live in an older neighborhood and not a cookie cutter suburban development. However, older homes are a challenge. When we bought the house, I had a fit about the electrical wiring. They had bare wires running through metal studs. Now I am not an electrician by any stretch of the imagination. I know that you flip the switch and in theory, the light should come on. That is the extent of my knowledge. However, even I knew that the bare wire thing was a disaster waiting to happen. Yesterday's little challenge involved plumbing. The plumbing in this house is also eccentric to say the least. The one time we had a plumber out, he left shaking his head at the way the plumbing had been hooked up. Yesterday the sink backed up. It happens a fair amount. In my quest to be more independent, I decided I was going to fix it myself. (the laughter may start now) For four hours I worked on it. I tried plunging, Draino, the snake. I even resorted to removing the pipes underneath the sink. No luck. After four hours, I conceded defeat. The sink won. I had to call my Dad to come save me. My parents live an hour away. He drove in and looked at what I had done. God bless him. He said I did all the right things. I just forgot to look at the pipe in the basement that sometimes plugs up. Sure enough, that was where the trouble was. It took him a total of 20 minutes to fix it. So much for my career as a plumber. I had class last night. I rushed to get there. Guess what, the instructor didn't show up. No messages were left for any of us. His phone went to voice mail. We didn't know what happened to him. Still don't. Since the class is called Professionalism and Ethical Practices, we sort of thought he would let us know if he wasn't going to be there. I will admit, I am a little concerned about his well being. I will hope he is okay. Since I didn't have school, I ended up at the daughter's baseball game. I was there a total of 5 minutes before the coach came off the field and said to me," We need you on the bench. We need some order there. Will you do it please?" Gee, me restore order to a group of eight year olds. HMMmmm does that mean I am a loud bitch who can scare them into behaving? I had one mom laughing at me because I told one kid to pick up the bat he threw and throw his attitude instead. (It made sense to me) There is one boy on the team that just tries my patience. I am not sure who I want to strangle more, him or his mom. The mom is supposed to be an assistant coach. She is not very useful. She chatted on the phone for 30 minutes. She had the batting order. I finally just ripped it right out of her arms. We needed it and both teams were waiting for her to get off the phone. Once I got the batting order straightened out, I had to go find her son. He was supposed to be on first base. Now both teams are waiting for this kid. I find him over by the creek playing. I drag him back to the diamond. He then runs over to his mom (who is still on the phone) I grabbed him again and gently moved his behind over to the base. The whole game went this way. Not once did the mom say anything to her kid. She did at one point tell the other boys that she would like to coach a girl's team because the boys say such rude things. Hello!!!????? Pay attention to your kid. Why do parents sign up their kids to play sports they obviously have no interest in playing?Better yet, Why do they agree to coach when they do jack shit?!? Since there was no homicide, I think I deserve a medal for this one. Self control is a wonderful thing. Thank god Monday only comes once a week FYI: ONLY 10 DAYS TIL INXS!

I HAVE BEEN TAGGED!

I have been tagged by Leigh. So here goes. I am... A mom. I said... Happiness is a warm gun and a cold body. I want... Love and passion. I wish... I was happy. I hate... Racism I miss... Security I fear... Being alone I hear... Garbage, Bleed Like Me. I wonder... What will my children become? I regret... many things I have done. I am not... a good person. I dance... Everyday in the kitchen. I sing... alone, in the car, and only to people who are tone deaf. I cry... everyday I'm not always... honest anymore. I made... A lot of mistakes. I write... for comfort. I confuse... Many people. I need... passion. I should... Be a better person. I start... laundry and never finnish. I finish... books. I believe in... God I know... Who my true friends are. I can... play the clarinet. I can't... Sing. I see... trees. I blog... Because I need to talk. I read...everything I can get my hands on. I am aroused by... Thehands of a man and passionate kisses. It pisses me off... that people don't pull their own weight. I find... there are alot of unhappy people out there. I like... Music and books I love... My children. I tag: Mark Cherry PM Tamara Tab

I will try again

I had to delete my former blog. Long story. I am back. A little wiser now.